What would you tell your family?

Ok, ok, you guys have met your end of the bargain. Malice IS cute, isn’t he? He rode in his owners backpack teh whole way. I hadn’t realized that he had “points” on his back, I wonder who got those? (The ‘punks’ are scattered throughout the race and if you stop to collect them, you get points, but you may lose your place in the race…)

Anyway, what would you tell your family if you suddenly found yourself in an awkward, um… self-satisfying sexual stimulation activity… with something stuck inside of you? I’ll leave out the details, but if this ever happens to you, PLEASE just tell your family that you’re going out for some milk and you’ll be back in a few hours, rather than rushing out of the house to the emergency room to have said object extracted from your private area(s). His wife and daughter were franticly searching for him, convinced he was having a heart attack. I guess his explanation to them of kidney stones is all they really needed to know. It at least explains his follow up visit to the urologist.

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