Well, it’s been a long time in coming, but I feel that it’s time to share it with all of you. Doc Shazam is hanging up the stethescope. I’ve had it, I’m through. The healthcare field sickens me both literally and figuratively. I’ve gained weight, can’t sleep, suffer from migraines, have chronic shift worker’s disease, chronic sleep deprivation, and am horribly out of shape. I’ve sacrificed not only my physical health for this profession, but also my social health. I get anxious and feel panic well up inside of me when my friends mention going away for a weekend. Why? Chances are more likely than not I’ll have to work that weekend. If not the weekend, then definately the friday night before. Last year I didn’t get to participate in a single weekend bike race…a passion of mine, because I either worked every weekend, or every friday night until 1 or 3am. For long time readers of Doc Shazam, you know how much I love to bike.
For all the wonderful things that come from being a doctor…the priveledge and thrill of saving lives, running codes, knowing how to set broken bones and suture kids faces without scarring…there are far more downsides for me.
No matter what the paycheck, it’s not worth it if I’m constantly tired, constantly have a headache, cannot pursue relationships with friends or family on a routine basis.
Yes, I know that there are many other physicians that (seem) to be able to do all of this, but when I discuss my recent decision with them, they all express a wish that they too could follow the same path.
What will Doc Shazam do? Hopefully write. Ride her bike. Coach Triathletes & cyclists. Garden. Find myself again. Rid myself of insomnia, anxiety and panic. Restore relationships with friends and family. And become a better bike racer.